Have you seen this man?

boston metro - Brookline police are searching for a man that ejaculated on a woman in the public library this weekend.
A surveillance image of the suspect was posted yesterday.
He went to the public library just after 1 p.m. Saturday, sat next to a young woman at a table and set up his laptop computer, police said. The man then masturbated, stood up and ejaculated on the woman, who screamed while the man fled.

What a fucking dirtbag. Is there anything worse than having to spend a beautiful Saturday afternoon studying at the library? Well apparently there is. What I'd like to know is if this guy was sitting next to her, how did she not know that he was pumping off? When I'm in the library I get distracted by people typing too hard on their keyboards or breathing too loudly. So I'm pretty sure I'd be able to hear some chap vigorously slapping his dick around right next to me.

Maybe she did know what was going on, but she didn't say anything because it was turning her on. It's hard to tell from the photo, but this guy kind of looks like he's got sort of a Johnny Depp/ urban hipster thing going on with his beard and unkempt hair. And the flowing scarf is a nice touch. I bet if this guy whipped his dick out and just showed it to her first, she might be down for something. The whole thing was setting up like a Penthouse Forum story. And isn't there a whole underground society in Brookline where people have anonymous sex in public buildings? The Kennedy's were from Brookline, I think they started it. For all we know, this chick could've been into this whole scene, but now we'll never know because this guy broke rule number 1, never blow a load on anybody before making eye contact. Classic rookie mistake.