Osama bit the big one.

(bin Laden's dick, as seen through 7 magnifying glasses.)

Osama bin Laden was killed yesterday in Pakistan, and I couldn't be happier. The guy caused a lot of pain and suffering around the world, and that motherfucker finally got what was coming to him....in just a shade under a decade. I don't really get why so many people were celebrating in Times Square and DC and all over the country, though. People hit the streets, jumping up and down, and chanting USA! USA!, like their team just won the Superbowl or something. If this happened in 2001 or 2002, I would've been right out there with them, but it didn't. Since the attacks on September 11, we got into two wars, lost over 6,000 soldier's lives, and crippled our economy by spending over $1 trillion on those very wars. When you think about the incredible price that was paid to get to this point, celebrating in the streets doesn't really seem appropriate. Kind of like when the Yankees win the world series.

And how do we know that Osama is even really dead? According to this random nitwit that I overheard in conversation at the gym, the government is making the whole thing up. He's not going to believe that bin Laden is actually dead until he sees visual evidence to prove it. The guy talking to random nitwit was understandably skeptical. He asked random nitwit if he was one of those guys who didn't believe in the moon landing either. Random nitwit replied that of course he believed in the moon landing because we have such a high level of technology nowadays that space travel seems easily accomplished. He went on to say that so many of the everyday items that we use were developed by NASA. I found it interesting that he included peanut butter on his list of NASA inventions. After hearing that, I figured this whole bin Laden death conspiracy might be something worth looking into. Stay tuned.